Reality Eds
by Creep E. Crawly Man
Summary: When their latest scam screws up, the Eds find themselves on a adventure, crossing over with random cartoons! HIATUS
1. The Beginning Of The Ed

**Reality Eds**

By: Bugsplee

Note: Welcome to "Reality Eds"! This fic was based off one of my older fanfiction which I written on paper in 2003. So don't flame me or hate my story because of older cartoons on this fic. Thanks.

--

_Part One: The Beginning Of The Ed_

It was a normal perfectly normal day in the cul-de-sacof Peach Creek where the Eds were trying to think up a scam in Ed's disgusting basement.

Eddy: What kind of gimmick which attract some suckers?

Ed: Birds?

Eddy: I hate birds, Ed.

Ed: Chewed-up gum?

Edd: Ed, that's disgusting!

Ed: My brain hurts.

Eddy: If you have one.

Edd: Let's face it, Eddy. We just can't come up with a scam today.

Eddy: We have to!

Edd: It's "we _need _to", Eddy.

Eddy: Whatever. Kevin said his dad's company is putting a secret flavor in one of his jawbreakers!

Edd: Eddy, even if we had money, you would horrible odds to find that flavor in any of those jawbreakers.

Ed: Pizza bites!

Eddy: Shut up, Ed!(groans) We need help.

Then, the Ems (Em, Emm n Emma) came through Ed's window.

(Note: The Ems are female versions of the Eds.)

Emm: Hey, guys.

Eds:(sighs)

Emma: What's with you guys?

Edd: We're hopelessly thinking of a ingenius scam for Eddy.

Eddy: I got scammer's block again.

Then, Double M(Emm) whispered in Emma's ear. The girl smiled as she took off her backpack and pulled out a golden book entitled, "The Ultimate Scams".

Eddy: What the heck is that?

Emma: It's my scam book. It's filled with thousands of scams.

Eddy:(grabs book) Now this is what I'm talking about!

The three-haired boy quickly flipped through the pages until Edd came over and pointed to a scam in the book.

Edd: What about this one, Eddy?

The hat-wearing boy pointed to a scam which had a picture of weird-looking laser.

Eddy: "The Warping Machine"? Great idea! Those kids will pay me a river of quarters and I'll get that flavored jawbreaker!

Ed: For better or for worst!

Eddy: Shut up, Ed!(closes book) Let's get to work!

Outside, Double D and Double M were busy building the machine and Ed and Em were busy making the stand for it while Eddy and Emma were laying in their lawn chairs, watching the process. After 20 minutes of labor, the machine was done.

Ed: Shiny!

Eddy: Now to catch some suckers!

Then, Kevin came over to see was the Eds and Ems were up to.

Kevin: Hey, Dorks and Dorkettes! What the heck are you doing now?

Eddy: We're running a scam with a laser.

Ed: A laser from the movie, "Night Of The Big-Eyed Laser Freaks"!

Edd: Would you like to demostrate the laser with us?

Kevin: Whatever.

The boy stepped on a big red "X" which was printed in front of the laser. Double D came over to the laser and began starting it up.

Edd: Hold still, Kevin.

Suddently, sparks and parts of the laser started to fly all over the place while a red laser appeared over Kevin's head.

Kevin:(freaked-out) Whoa! I'm outta here!(runs off)

Eddy: Kevin, wait!

Edd: Eddy, watch out for the- -

The Eds ran in front of the laser which started to whine loudly.

Ed: I will save- -

_**ZAP!**_

The Ems came over to see what had happened but when the smoke cleared away, the Eds were gone.

Emma: Where did they go?!

Emm: I...don't know.

Ed: Uh-oh.

_To Be continued..._

--

Stay tuned for next time!

-Bugsplee


	2. Invader Ed

**Reality Eds**

By: Bugsplee

Note: Welcome to second part of "Reality Eds". Guess who the Eds are gonna meet? That's right! Z-to-the-I-to-the-M! Enjoy the weird stuff.

--

_Part Two: Invader Ed_

Now we see the Eds hurling through a bright green vortex tunnel, heading towards you-know-where.

Ed: Dizzy!

Edd: I think I'm going to be sick!

Suddently, the Eds fell out of the vortex and landed into a middle of a strange cul-de-sac in a strange new world.

Ed: Honey, I'm home!

Eddy: Ow. My head.(looks around) This looks nothing like the cul-de-sac.

Edd: In fact, I don't think this is even Peach Creek at all!

Ed: Cool.

Then, green spooky glowing came from a weird narrow house which was between two houses and had pipes welded into the house. Also, there were spooky lawn gnomes(which moved their eyes) and a small nearby flag which said: "I Heart Earth".

Edd: What a crude-looking house.

Ed: It reminds me of "The Night Of The Creature Casa!", the mini-series.

Eddy: Shut up, Ed. Let's go see.

The Eds walked towards the front door which had a bathroom sign on it. Edd rang the doorbell and two weird robots answered it. The first robot looked like a dad and the second robot looked like a mom but she was wearing a tutu and rubber gloves.

Parent-Bots: Welcome home, son!

Edd: What?

The robots just stood there, staring into nothing.

Eddy: Come let us in!

The Parent-Bot retreated back into the closet as the Eds.

Ed: Cool!

The dim-witted Ed-boy noticed a small metal robot on the couch, eating a taco and watching TV.

Edd: An actual robot! I've been dreaming to see a robot in real life!

Eddy: Whatever, Sockhead.

Gir: I'm eating a taco!!

Edd: Uhh...good for you?

Gir: I'm Gir!

Ed: I'm Ed!

Gir: Hi, Ed!

Ed: Hi, Gir!

Ed&Gir: TV!

The two watched TV as the other Eds stared at them oddly.

Eddy: It's like they're brothers.

Suddently, a loud alarm went off. The Eds covered their ears as a green figure entered the room. The figure had green skin, red eyes and a backpack which was attached to his body.

Zim: Humans?!

Ed:(gasp) An alien!

Gir: Tacos!

Zim: How dare you enter the lair of ZIM! Gir, capture them!

The little robot's eyes turned red and he hopped off the couch as very big weapons came out of his head. The Eds moved into a corner in fear.

Zim: You shall pay!

Eddy: Can we make a deal or something?

Zim: Zim makes no deals with inferior humans! Gir, destroy them!

However, before Gir was just about to fire at them, he started dance wildly.

Gir: YEE-HAW! I'm a dancin' monkey!

Zim:(growls) Computer, grab those humans!

Suddently, a big claw came from the ceiling and grabbed the Eds. Later, the Eds wake up to find themselves inside of a laser cage in Zim's lab.

Zim: Hello, stupid earth monkies!

Edd: Where are we?

Ed: Chickenland?

Zim: You're in my secret alien lab. You fools are now property of the Irken military!

Edd: Not good!

Ed: Onion dip!

Eddy: Shut up, Ed!

Zim: Before I shoot into the depths of space, I need to see what kind of stupid brains you have.

The green little alien came over to his computer and pressed a bright orange button which made a huge laser appear from the ceiling and scan the Eds' head. On the computer screen, it shows an x-ray scan of the Eds' head where Ed had a tiny peanut-like brain, Edd had a very large brain and Eddy had a slightly smaller brain than Edd's and slightly bigger than Ed's.

Zim: Hmm...it looks like the foolish human with the sock-like hat is the brightest out of the three of you.

Ed: Ed is smart like cookies!

Zim: Silence! In ten minutes, I will sent you to your doom in space!

Edd: But we will not be able to breathe in the airless depths of space!

Zim: Exactly.

Suddently, Gir crashed into the lab in a tube.

Gir: Whee!

Double D had an idea for a moment. He noticed that Zim wasn't looking and there was a careful placed screwdriver on his worktable.

Edd: Gir?

Gir: Yes, Sockhead Guy?

Edd: Do you mind getting me that screwdriver over there?

Gir: Okay!

The clueless robot grabbed the screwdriver and gave it to Double D.

Edd: Thank you.

Gir: Okay!

Eddy: Way to go, sockhead!

Edd started unscrewing the bolts of the laser cage. The Eds were free, but when they opened the cage door, the door made off a loud squeaky noise.

_**SQUEAK!!**_

Zim turned around, only to see the cage wide open and the Eds gone.

Zim: Where are the humans?!

The alien spotted his robot ally banging his head like an idiot.

Zim: Gir, did you free the humans?

Gir: Maybe.

Zim:(growls)

Outside, we see the Eds running for their lives out of the cul-de-sac.

Eddy: That was close.

Edd: You can say that we were almost "spaced-out".

Ed: Boo!

Edd: Anyway, we need to find a way back to Peack Creek and lose that hideous alien!

Eddy: Relax, Double D. All we need to do is find another stupid laser!

The Eds ran into the central where Gaz and Dib were. Dib was holding a picture which three familar-looking aliens had a sock-like hat, three hairs and a large single eyebrow.

Dib:(waving picture) Look, Gaz! I got an picture of the Alien Crew! I got free with this month's "Mysterious Mysteries" Magazine!

Gaz: Whatever.

Suddently, the Eds crashed into the two.

Dib: Ow! Watch where you- -(stared at Eds)

Eddy: What?

The big-headed kid started to compare the picture with the Eds.

Dib: They're the Alien Crew!

Ed: We're not aliens!

Then, Dib pulled out his cuff-links.

Dib: Once I put these on you, I'll finally have prove of aliens!

Ed: Trouble!

The dim-witted Ed-boy pointed to Zim and Gir riding in their Voot Cruiser.

Zim:(on microphone) Hands off, Dib! These wobble-outlined humans are MINE!

Dib: You're even more dumb than I thought! These are aliens!

Zim: You can't trick me! These foolish life-forms are from Earth!

Eddy: Foolish?!

Zim:(ignoring Eddy) Now, surrender those fools!

Eddy: That's it! Ed, "tree" them!

Ed: Okay, Eddy!

Ed pulls out a nearby oak tree right out of the ground and starts wacking it on the Voot Cruiser.

_**WACK!**_

_**THUMP!**_

_**BAM!**_

Zim: Hey!

Eddy: Way to go, Lumpy!

Dib: This alien guy may be dumb, but he's strong.

Double D saw the big-headed kid come over to him with his cuff-links. Dib quickly snaps the cuff-links onto Edd's arms before he had a chance to get away.

Dib: Got ya!

The brainy Ed-boy fell down, knocked out. Dib pulls out a bottle-like alien capture unit which sucked Double D inside it.

Dib: I did it! I finally caught an alien!

As the big-headed kid waved the bottle in victory, his scary sister takes the bottle and stuffs it into here backpack.

Gaz: Thanks. I needed a soda.

Dib: Gaz, wait! That's an alien!

Dib followed his sister back to their home while Ed continued to smash the Voot Cruiser with the tree. Zim's ship was in bad shape and looked like it was about to crash...which it did.

_**CRASH!**_

Ed: The wibbles have been whacked, Eddy!

Eddy: Nice job, Ed.

Then, the green evil alien and his robot partner crawled out of the rubble.

Gir: Let's do it again!

Zim: Now I got- -(gasps)

Zim noticed at everyone had disappered from the park.

Zim: Drat! They have escaped the wrath of ZIM! Thankfully, I brought my "Human Hunter 2000!"(pulls out machine)

The alien turned the dial on the "Human Hunter 2000" and five little green dots appeared onscreen. Then, Zim and Gir put on their disguises.

Zim: Now we must hunt down the humans and _DIB _and destroy them all!

Gir: Yay!

Meanwhile, Dib was trying to reach his sister. However, Gaz got onto a bus before he could catch her.

Dib: Darn it!

Suddently, the remaining Ed-boys crashed into Dib again.

Dib: You!

Eddy: Wait. Let's make a deal. If you can help us get back home and get our friend back, we'll help you get that green guy.

Dib: Really?

Eddy: Sure.

Dib:(thinking) _So, in order to catch an alien, I need to help an alien._(reality) You got it.

Eddy and Eddy shook hands on it.

Ed: Peanut butter on toast!

Dib: Is he always like that?

Eddy: Pretty much.

Soon, Ed, Eddy and Dib ran after Gaz's bus while Zim and Gir were hot on their trail.

Gir: Are we there yet?

Zim: No.

Gir: Are we there yet?

Zim: No.

Gir: Are we there yet?

Zim: SHUT UP, GIR!!

Gir: Okay!

Back with everone else, Gaz steps out of her bus and entered the house. Dib and the Eds saw her and followed her in. Inside, Gaz quickly locked the bottle inside of her drawer.

Dib: Gaz, get us back that bottle!

Gaz: This is my soda and you or your friends can't have it!

Dib: That's not a soda! There's an alien inside it!

Gaz:(scoffs) Yeah, right.(walks away)

Eddy: Forget the twerp, Dib. We need Double D to get back homE!

Eddy tries to shake the drawer open but nothing happens.

Ed:(pulls out key) I found a key!

Eddy: Ed, you finally found a brain!

Ed: Thank you.

Dib unlocked the drawer and grabbed the bottle. He opens the bottle and the brainy Ed-boy popped out and landed on the couch.

Edd:(dizzy) What happened?

Eddy: It's a long story. Now, let's go home!

Dib: Follow me!

The Eds followed the big-headed into his dad's lab where he pointed to a big metal door.

Dib: This is my dad's Turbo-Transporter.

Edd: Perfect! We'll be back in Peach Creek in no time!

Just before the Eds entered the machine, Zim and Gir busted into the room.

Dib: ZIM?!

Zim: That's right, Dib! Surrender the humans to me!

Dib: No way!

Zim: Then, feel the wrath of ZIM!!

As the two fought, the Ed-boys entered the Transporter and disappeared into the unknown. Then, Gaz came into the lab with the empty bottle.

Gaz: You drank my soda. YOU WILL PAY!!

Dib and Zim shook in fear while Gir was stupidly pressing buttons.

**To Be Continu-ED...**

_Will the Eds return to their home? What mysterious world will they appear next? And why am I talking like this? STAY TUNED!_

-Bugsplee


End file.
